Why Can't Kids........

E will often start questions with those three words, usually as part of his argument to justify some inappropriate behavior.

As part of the curriculum of E's school, the students go swimming two times a week.  The first day at swimming last week, E decided that he would shed his trunks.  His attempt was cut short and had to sit out the rest of the swim period.

After such situations, Sandi or I will talk about why he thought that was appropriate.  As part of this conversation, E asked Why can't kids swim naked?  Sandi responded that kids can't swim without trunks and that no one really needs to see that.

This got me thinking as to other questions E has asked.

Why can't kids live at Disney?

Why can't kids play the Star Wars games at the casino?

Why can't kids skip breakfast and go right to the Magic Kingdom?

Why can't kids stay up all night on a school night?

Why can't kids........  I like the fact that E challenges the status quo.  He may question authority and advocates, but he does in a unique way.  His questions asks Why Can't Kids, not Why Can't I.  He advocates for everyone, not just himself.  I don't know the origin of this style of advocacy.  He has heard me make arguments advocating for this position or that position, but I don't think I have ever advocated quite like he does nor as often.

The prevailing thought is that individuals impacted by autism don't understand the world around them and don't often consider the other people around him.    Like E's drive to challenge authority, he challenges that notion constantly.  It is that innate need to question and challenge that makes him unique and so difficult at the same time.  Often he will ask a question that Sandi and I have to take a minute or two to come up with an answer.  I hate saying "because" or "because I said so".  They were irritating to me as a child and I promised myself I would never use them with my kids.  Sandi and I don't soften or dumb things down when discussing matters or issues with E.  We speak with him as any parent would speak to their twelve year old.  I don't think it's an understatement to say he knows more than we think he knows.

In a world of stereotypes, I like the fact that E shatters the typical notions of autism.  Yes, he is good at math, but is that because of the typical stereotype of being impacted autism or because of the typical stereotype of being asian.  He loves motion, roller coasters and speed.  Is that because of autism or because he is almost 13 years old.  He is unable to talk, but speaks volumes.  E is an atypical autistic.  He challenges as much as he is challenged.  He acknowledges his difference, but still lives the life of a typical 12 year old.  We rarely deny him the opportunity to live, for fear I will hear a question beginning with those three words............

Why Can't Kids.........

When E asks Why kid's can't........, I smile knowing that kids, especially E, can.

Thanks E for showing everyone that there are differences to everyone (disabled or not).

Thanks for reading; more to come.

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